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	<title>NapkinShower -- Leave your morals at home!</title>
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	<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com</link>
	<description>Leave your morals at home!</description>
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		<title>NapkinShower -- Leave your morals at home!</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com</link>
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			<item>
		<title>I hate smart cars</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/19/the-car-with-down-syndrome/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/19/the-car-with-down-syndrome/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 19 Dec 2008 20:59:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beetle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheap ass]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dignity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[down syndrome]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[drive by shootings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fat girls]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gas mileage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mouth vomit]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[murder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nuclear war]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rape]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[smart car]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[uninformed consumers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=227</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If I had a gun for every time I saw a &#8220;smart car&#8221; or as I like to call it &#8220;you obviously don&#8217;t have a fucking brain car&#8221; I would not be writing this because being convicted for multiple counts of murder  in the first degree has consequences.
Why would someone buy a car with [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=227&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>

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			<media:title type="html">smart-car</media:title>
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			<media:title type="html">smallnotcute</media:title>
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	</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;Immaculate&#8221; heart of Mary</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/18/immaculate-heart-of-mary/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/18/immaculate-heart-of-mary/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Dec 2008 03:14:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[catholic school]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[immaculate heart]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[virgin mary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/18/immaculate-heart-of-mary/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[       <img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=222&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>

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			<media:title type="html">coming</media:title>
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		<item>
		<title>The middle finger</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/17/the-middle-finger/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/17/the-middle-finger/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Dec 2008 01:58:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Canada]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[civil war]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[keebler elf]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mason dixon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[middle finger]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=214</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I love the middle finger &#8211; the epithet of the hand. I got to slap one right in the face of a truck driver today. I had a coy smile on my face that delivered a cold hard message to him &#8220;enjoy your GED asshole&#8221;. What a cunt, the guy is driving a truck with [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=214&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>I am thinking</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/08/i-am-thinking/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/08/i-am-thinking/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Dec 2008 08:07:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dildo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[staple guns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stop bragging you're a cunt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ugly people]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[vagina]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=204</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I can&#8217;t sleep because I am thinking.
I am thinking about Mandalay coming into my room at 1:30 in the morning. Stating I just missed one of the most amazing things he had ever seen: Brad brought home a girl
I am thinking about how badly I want to kick in Brad&#8217;s door right now and steal [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=204&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/08/i-am-thinking/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Falcor &#8211; the cock UNblocker</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/05/falcor-the-cock-unblocker/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/05/falcor-the-cock-unblocker/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Dec 2008 19:30:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bone smoothies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cannibalism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[death threats]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[open bar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pee]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sorority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wing man]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=202</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Friday. 3:46 AM
Text messages, from Mandalay to Falcor
&#8220;Fuck you&#8221;
7:27 AM
&#8220;I&#8217;m going to kill you if you&#8217;re stupid enough to ever wake up&#8221;
&#8220;I&#8217;m going to step on your face and then I&#8217;m going to eat your face. And then I&#8217;m going to stab where your face was. All day&#8221;
7:53 AM
&#8220;I&#8217;m going to pee on you. Right [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=202&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/12/05/falcor-the-cock-unblocker/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Fanmail</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/fanmail/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/fanmail/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 30 Nov 2008 19:48:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ectasy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fanmail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lick my asshole regan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[welfare]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=190</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The following messages were sent to me from a guy who calls himself &#8220;regan =]&#8221;
2008/11/30 at 6:04 PM
hey man no wonder you get no girls you talk about them like they are worthles pieces of meat grow a dick and get some respect you douche bag theres no need to ever fucking talk so much [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=190&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/fanmail/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>If there were no hangovers every pansy pushing cock sucker would do what I do. I&#8217;m certified, leave debauchery to the professionals</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/if-there-were-no-hangovers-every-pansy-pushing-cock-sucker-would-do-what-i-do-im-certified-leave-debauchery-to-the-professionals/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/if-there-were-no-hangovers-every-pansy-pushing-cock-sucker-would-do-what-i-do-im-certified-leave-debauchery-to-the-professionals/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 30 Nov 2008 05:00:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[140 proof candy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blatant foreshadowing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[how i lost my job]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[less fortunate sober children]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mormons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[vomit]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=180</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I went over my friend&#8217;s house, just needing a night to relax. If you believed that, this is the first post you&#8217;ve read, continue reading, and get back to me.
I run into an old friend of mine, Black Seal Rum. For those of you who have yet had the pleasure, it&#8217;s essentially Rupplemints on crack. [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=180&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/if-there-were-no-hangovers-every-pansy-pushing-cock-sucker-would-do-what-i-do-im-certified-leave-debauchery-to-the-professionals/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Baltimore &#8211; keep your expectations low</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/27/baltimore-keep-your-expectations-low/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/27/baltimore-keep-your-expectations-low/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 27 Nov 2008 18:16:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Falcor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[baltimore]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crime rate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[low expectations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[murder rate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[neil diamond]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[welfare]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=165</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you live in Baltimore you&#8217;ve passed a public bench or two at some point in your miserable existence. If you&#8217;re literate, and weren&#8217;t running from the police, I&#8217;m sure you&#8217;ve had a few seconds to take note of the absurd proclamations we make as a city. I&#8217;m certain there are more, but two I&#8217;ve [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=165&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/27/baltimore-keep-your-expectations-low/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Falcor</media:title>
		</media:content>

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			<media:title type="html">baltimore-bench</media:title>
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	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Mandalay on strategy</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/mandalay-on-strategy/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/mandalay-on-strategy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 24 Nov 2008 19:03:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mandalay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Canada]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[domination]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hangman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[the tallest boot in the world]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ukrainian rape festival]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[winning]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[World War 1]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=160</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You should start every game of hang-man by saying &#8220;I&#8217;m not sure I spelled this word right&#8221;. Even if you are 100% sure you did. You want to keep the bastards off-balance. Like a sea sick Ukrainian girl with an inner ear infection. While you&#8217;re at it, before every game you should get your opponent [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=160&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/mandalay-on-strategy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Mandalay</media:title>
		</media:content>
	</item>
		<item>
		<title>A pretentious shade of blue</title>
		<link>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/a-pretentious-shade-of-blue/</link>
		<comments>http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/a-pretentious-shade-of-blue/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 24 Nov 2008 18:51:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mandalay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[11 inches]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[A-Number One]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[better than you]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[don't talk to me]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flawless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[steal your girlfriend]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[without equal]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com/?p=158</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I really feel as though I&#8217;m the most powerful man on the planet. But sometimes people don&#8217;t treat me that way and that makes me sad. Because it really isn&#8217;t that easy to be this incredible; that is to say that it might be hard for you to do it.
So when guys hear their girlfriends [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup.wordpress.com&blog=5265766&post=158&subd=realstoriesweprobablydefinitelymadeup&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
	
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